I've just realized that I used to use the word "blessing" connected to money a lot. I'd find myself saying things like, "we're blessed to be able to afford this large apartment," or "we're blessed to be able to bring in such a great salary," it was almost an excuse in times when I felt I was living too well. It was as if I was saying, yes, I feel guilty living this way so I'm going to rub a little gratefulness and god onto the situation to make myself feel better.
So anyhow, I realized this the other day because lately I'm really feeling blessed, and suddenly it has nothing to do with money at all. In fact, my husband and I are living off the smallest income we've ever brought in, and I find myself feeling more blessed than ever. It's kind of hard to describe, but it is a fullness, an overwhelming feeling of love and peace despite being in the midst of transition and instability financially and emotionally. It's a peace and joy that laughs in the face of momentary circumstances. For me to feel peace and joy in the midst of questions like "what's next?" I know it has to be a gift from God.
So lately I've been feeling really blessed ...
... Blessed in a whole new way.